Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Long, Lean and Dangerous!

The title is a description of one of my favorite things to do for the past 10 years. I love them- the feel of them between my fingers, the relief they give me as they line my throat, the release from being overly stuft they provide after a meal... the 7 minute breaks they give me from work, the social benefits when outside at a bar... bored, no big deal- they'll keep you company. Stressed- they'll relax you.

These are the moments that cigarettes offer there followers. They are like cult or gang leaders- they pull you in and until you drink the juice or get shot... chances are they won't let you leave them behind! Even when you know you don't want one, your throat is sore- your cough is rough and unforgiving... doesn't matter- you'll find a way to let them in. Is it freezing outside? Too bad, better put on really warm clothes- because the cigarettes want your attention. Afterall, you spend about $200 a month on them- you might as well make sure they are a priority!

Well, six days ago I said goodbye. Am I happy about this? Ofcourse, I'll be healthier, won't smell, will have clearer skin, save $2400/yr and will be more socially accepted. But, not to lie... I miss it, really really miss it. The amount of time I spend thinking about it is ridiculous. If I only dedicated this much thought to other faucets of my life- how successful I would be!
It's getting easier day by day- but it's still a long road and I know I'll make it and be happy that I did. However, I do wish I could have one more. I won't- I've made up my mind- but, man do I love them... but I love me more. I will love my husband and children more... and hopefully, this decision will give me more time with them(whenever they should come into my life!).

Anyway- hope you are having a good day! I smell great!!! It's the little things I am trying to appreciate =) and that are making my day great.